I can't get a break..

It seems like lately these days, I'm the bad guy. I'm always the one to blame. I try to keep everybody happy, but I can't do anything right. I can't help but feel it's never going to be the same. There are some things that I'm able to accept blame for and I'm able to admit when I'm wrong, but I will not be called a liar, when I know that I'm not lying or in the wrong. I normally, don't ever make promises I know I won't be able to keep. I don't make plans if I know that in the end I'll have to break them, because I know how it feels to be promised something and then be let down when it comes time to doing said something. I learned that at a very young age. I don't fuck people over, just to do it or because I think I'm more important than anybody else. I'm sick and tired of everybody walking all over me and me not saying a fucking word about it. All my life I have been taking orders from everybody else, because I thought it was okay and I always put everybody else before my own self because I care too much about everybody else and their feelings more so than my own. I don't think I'm better than anybody else and I never ever, once stated that the world revolves around me, but seriously, when do I get my break? I honestly, cannot recall a time where I have ever felt so damn low in my life. I'm trying to be the best person I can be. I'm doing the only thing I know how and that's living. Everybody has their imperfections, don't get me wrong. But being an untrue, dishonest and disloyal person is definitely not one of mine. I don't ever try to cause problems. I'm not the drama starter, usually I'm the resolver. I'm the go-to and the person in-between. I never ever intend to hurt any of my friends or family, or anybody around me.. I'm not saying I'm a saint, but I'm definitely not cold hearted. I just wish that sometimes, when confrontation is needed it can be resolved in a civil and human like manner. I don't understand how "friends" can treat one another so poorly sometimes. I don't understand why people think it's okay to treat people the way they do sometimes. I'll admit, I've had my moments of hostility. But, I've been trying to change that and I know when people deserve it and when they don't. But what's been coming my way lately, especially this week, today and the last couple of days, I think I definitely deserved to be treated with a little more respect than what I have been getting. I absolutely, cannot wait to move to Los Angeles and get out of this hell hole. I'll probably miss a select few.... and with that, I'll be making some changes. It's not going to be easy for me but I know what I have to do in order to make some dreams of mine, a reality. - Finally... the count down to December begins.